Saturday, September 11, 2010

"Don't Break Your Child's Spirit" the title of a really balanced and encouraging article written by Taffi Dollar, the wife of the well known preacher, Creflo Dollar (I personally LOVE his teaching!!!).

Article HERE

Taffi and Creflo Dollar
World Changers Church
Atalanta, GA

I sometimes wonder if I am disciplining my daughter correctly. I will admit I could do a better job at being consistent, but like everyone else, I lapse in that area when I'm tired or frustrated or just don't care anymore ("go ahead, pull everything out of the drawer for the millionth time...I don't care!!!").

I try to speak gently and not yell, but will also admit that out of frustration, I do that too sometimes. When I think back on my mother and her discipline style, I don't ever remember her being rash or extremely hateful. Her voice was normally very gentle and sweet. But if we knowingly did wrong, we knew that a spanking was the consequence. But the good thing about that is if it's done correctly, you rarely have to spank. And we didn't get very many. Just like this article says, you don't hold your child to ridiculous standards and you certainly don't punish them all the time or beat them!

And I love that she suggests praying before you discipline so that God will give you wisdom about what is best for them. I first heard this concept from Lori (otherwise known as Miss "Ruby Red Slippers") over at "Lions, Tigers and Boys, Oh My!" She has told some tender and thoughtful stories of how she has taught her children what the scripture says about what they did wrong and not being afraid of calling it sin. I've taken to heart a lot of her wisdom.

I never want to break my child's spirit or scare her or put fear in her. Now, there are healthy fears, but I'm talking about fearing us in a way that would one day cause her not to come to us if she needed us for fear of judgment or harsh punishment. I want her to feel loved, but that we care about her enough to teach her and correct her. Because some parents unfortunately don't...

What are your thoughts on this article or on discipline in general?


  1. Thank you for the kind words-
    I think my favorite books that have helped me parent, and dicipline are tried and true:
    Dr. Dobson has such wisdom, and his books on The Strong Willed Child, and Dare To Dicipline-really gave me the eternal perspective to parenting.
    I think to myself-I am raising someone's husband, and more importantly-I want to see my boy's faces in Heaven one day...That motivates me not to give up on those hard days-and to dicpline with love, and purpose...
    You are doing a great job-I know because here you are, posting about it, and thinking about parenting-that is more than many people out there.
    Keep going, keep praying!

  2. I agree with the article, except the spanking part, which I do not believe in at all. I love this article on the subject of spanking and the proverbs verses.

    Also, this quote comes to mind: ‎"Your job as a parent is to strengthen, not break, your child's will. That will has a vital role to play in ensuring his safety and the fulfillment of his potential. Your child's will can only serve him if it is left strong and whole, not if it is weak or broken." - Becky Bailey, Ph.D.,


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