Have you ever fallen? I mean literally, fallen flat on your behind? Gosh, is there anything more humiliating or disheartening? For some reason, it feels REALLY bad and makes me feel like a big loser all day.
I've fallen plenty of times. My favorite was once when I was singing at my church while a nationally known speaker was there...I was so excited! But when I was coming down I tripped all the way down the steps right in front of him! So embarrassing! Yes, I know it's an accident, I know that I AM NOT a loser, but falling does something really negative to the way you think...does anyone out there agree with me?
I think it would be safe to say that most adults don't trip and fall very often, at least I don't. But there have been a couple of times, just in the past few weeks actually, where I have tripped (usually from wearing flip flops) and fell, and it sucks!
I did it again just this morning. I was outside sweeping our patio and pulling weeds. I took a step and my flip flop got caught on an uneven paving stone and I just went face first. I DID NOT want to catch myself with my knees...ugh! That would have been painful! So I quickly turned a little and landed on my behind and caught myself with my hands. I will probably have a bruise there and did scrape up my hands. OUCH! I didn't immediately laugh it off, or dust myself off and hop back up. No. I sat there for a couple of minutes, pouting and I wanted to cry! It hurt and I felt humiliated! No one saw me, it was just an accident, no harm done, I mean it was just a little fall. But it did something to me. It always does. And I'm not sure why?
I think that maybe when we physically fall, we feel out of control. We can't help the inevitable spills that sometimes happen and we don't like it! Or maybe it's that we feel like a big ol' doofus! You sort of tell yourself, "You can't even take a few steps without tripping and falling flat on your butt! You sure are clumsy!" Talk about stinkin' thinkin'. Or maybe you are the kind of person who laughs it off and never gives it a second thought. But I don't I DWELL on it...BAD!
I've also know people, usually older ones, who have perhaps done this. They take a fall and for one reason or another, never quite recover. I had an aunt who did this as well as my grandfather. He fell once and didn't hardly get up again for 10 years! He just kind of scooted around with a cane. And it wasn't a medical issue, it was fear. And I totally get that.
So why can children fall, bloody up their knees and still hop back up just as quickly, shake it off and continue playing? Why does an adult fall constitute "falling apart?" Why does it feel so profound?
Have you taken a spill recently? How did it make you feel? What did it do to you? Were you able to just jump up and forget it? I'm interested in hearing your thoughts.
I haven't fallen recently but I did want to say. . . I'm getting more and more fearful every year of my life. The other day my kids were playing on the good ol' slip N' slide and just the thought of running and jumping down on my belly terrified me. Skating is another one. I use to skate like I was a pro, but I won't even put them on anymore because I'm too afraid I'll fall. Even riding a bike scares me. But that's probably b/c about a year and a half ago I was on the Virginia Creeper and bit the dust. Now that was embarrassing! A grown lady wrecking on her bike. I didn't get seriously hurt but I felt like hiding and crying. I just think kids don't have the understanding yet of all the danger that's around them.
ReplyDeletei did fall recently funnily enough... This time i laughed, last time i was winded and one of my daughters ran and hid because she thought i was dead! ....And the time before that (years ago, in my 20's) i cried! ...Maybe it is an example of how i have changed over the years? Great post X:-)
ReplyDeleteThe last time I fell was when I was pregnant with Cakes, and it really was humiliating. What made it worse was that everyone was fawning over me and making a big fuss, and I was so embarrassed that I just really wanted to be left alone.
ReplyDeleteAny when you fall as a grown-up, it hurts bad! But Cakes falls all the time, and usually she just says, "Ouch!" and then scampers away.